SportsBlahg

Most Expected National Anthem Singer Ever
Carrie Underwood

Conversation between me and my friend Vito during Wednesday night’s Game 1:

Vito: I wonder who will sing the national anthem when you’re out there.
Me: It’s Colorado… probably some country singer.

Biggest American Flag I Have Ever Seen
This one:

Longest Lines at Coors Field
The lines for Rockies apparel

Remember my whole thing about “Shiny Hats” yesterday? Yeah, I rest my case. Who comes to a game to support their favorite team without wearing the colors of their favorite team? Fans who just learned that their city had a baseball team three weeks ago.

Stadium DJ Most Likely to Get Offered a Gig at a Gay Prom
The Coors Field DJ

I have never heard so many 1990s-era dance songs in my life. For every ten songs with a booming bass line and a female singer, they played one rock song. And most baffling was the fact that the Rockies fans seemed to enjoy it. I’ve never seen so many sports fans get so excited about songs you could hear at a gay night club.

Coldest Place I Have Ever Seen a Baseball Game
Denver, Colorado

Oh my God, was it cold. I think I sent a text message to one of my friends at one point that read, “id txt u a lnger msg but i cant feel my fingers.” This is not the first time I’ve dealt with this. When I went to Coors Field in 1998, I saw my very first Major League Baseball snow delay. The stadium played Christmas music. This is a good lead-in to our next superlative…

Best Concession Item Offered at Coors Field
Hot Chocolate

This was brilliant. Vendors came around with racks full of styrofoam cups of hot chocolate and a can of whipped cream. Outside in the concourses, they sold it with peppermint schnapps. I think the Twins will have to look at making this a regular item when they open their new open-air stadium.

Most Unusual Bathroom Wall Ad
State of Washington Department of Corrections

It’s weird enough that they’re advertising for corrections officers in a baseball stadium. But they’re also advertising for them over 750 miles from the nearest Washington State Prison.

I also love the line “see the results of your care” as a benefit to being a Prison Nurse. These people are in prison. Should you be proud that you let a convicted serial killer stay healthy?

Most Annoying Yet Amusing Female Rockies Fan
This one:

This entry was posted on Sunday, October 28th, 2007 at 10:59 am and is filed under Baseball. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.